6/29 - My somewhat checkered past

My exbf left a message over Fathers Day weekend that I should call if I wanted to talk.  I didn’t, so the call wasn’t returned, but I started thinking about why I didn’t want to talk and that kinda morphed into one of those aha moments…..and I’m overdue blogging one of those.

I choose male companions based on what they do, not who they are.

It started when I really wanted a date for a Jr High Sadie Hawkins dance.  Of course, that means the girl has to ask the guy – so my few friends were kind enough to scope out who would be willing to say yes if I asked….and that’s how I ended up with my first “real” boyfriend.  I think it lasted about three weeks – I was tired of getting teased about having a dork boyfriend…..not that I wasn’t a dork myself but I desperately wanted to be accepted by the cooler kids.

Then there was the time in highschool where I stole someones boyfriend just long enough to get a date for Homecoming (and a couple of hickies).  Fortunately they got back together , and ended up married…hopefully still happily so.

Let me interject that my ex-husband was an exception – he was a wonderful, sensitive, understanding man – we just “got caught” which meant we had to get married much too young and just grew in different directions.  That said, I have to admit he had his own car……and a relatively new one, which made him quite a catch at the time ;).

After my separation there was the guy who loved clubs and didn’t mind dancing and adored gambling….which mean I got to spend a lot of time in Atlantic City…and I dealt blackjack for local charity games.  And he was OK with me having joint custody of a little kid…..we even took him along on some of our adventures (but never to the casino).

Time passed, and there were a couple of guys with boats (including the ex I refer to on occasion), one with a canoe, three with motorcycles(including two Harley owners , and a few  that liked to two step.   

But ironically, I don’t recall any of them sharing my passion for travel……or the internet….or even my politics….we just didn’t discuss anything “serious”.

My son talked to me a bit about his former  girlfriend/current wife, and it was very clear that not only do they have shared interests in politics, music, gaming and a host of other things – they also had discussed and were in agreement as far as building a family and a long term future.

Now, trying to be objective about all of this – it looks as if I never really took dating as a “tryout for a lifetime commitment” – rather it was just finding someone that I was attracted to that could teach me something new….or give me access to something I was craving.

So I’m wondering……when the rest of you were dating – what were you looking for?

6/20 - Zombie Deer defeated ( I hope)

I get home from work tonight, open the sliding door to the deck and see a deer running off.....so it seems I'm still being stalked by zombie deer.  But not being a gun owner (besides which it isn't deer season), and needing to get to aerobics class....there wasn't anything to be done.

Fast forward a couple of hours and I come back from aerobics to discover zombie deer once again in my yard...but this time I'm prepared.  I sneak into the kitchen and peer out the window and immediately realize that zombie deer is not trying to eat my brains......actually he's after my

squirrel corn feeder....I'd bought it in an attempt to save my birdseed from the marauding fuzzy tailed critters...but it seems that it is mislabeled and is actually zombie deer bait.

Said feeder is now elevated to six feet above the ground....as cool as it is to have deer close to the house I've just finished moving all the struggling, wellnibbled  hosta to a "safe zone" next to the house and so I really can't encourage Bambi.

So it appears that zombie deer was not wanting my brains after all.....but his scent did give Batcat an usually exciting evening walk.

Hope all of you are having a wonderful evening.......

Tonight's Awesome Moment

I switched birdfeeders in an attempt to outwit the squirrels - and I'm afraid that I confused the resident birds as its been very quiet around my feeders.

So I was quite excited to see a cardinal out this evening but by the time I grabbed the camera and made it to the deck it was gone....

However, I was not alone.

I sat and watched it for a while....until I realized

that it was likely a Zombie Deer - check out the glowing eyes......

What do I do now?

6/18 - Shopping with the old man

First off, let me say that I know how lucky I am to still have a parent alive and I do cherish the time I get to spend with my dad - particularly since we've only really gotten to know each other in the past few years since my mom died.

He has trouble getting around - and he moves really really ssssslllllooooowwwww - so we don't get out much together.  (I was going to say he doesn't get out much, but then I recently learned about his secret life at the grocery store).

But he needed new shoes - and thats something that he really needs to be there for.  I have no idea what his taste in footwear runs to, but because he has trouble lifting one of his legs, they need to be lightweight, yet provide good support - and with all that they must be roomy enough to allow for his feet to swell as they do on occasion.  And did I mention that they can't have a lot of rugged tread on the bottom - that makes them "sticky" which keeps him from sliding his bad foot along.

So we'd been planning a trip to Kohls - because it's an easy in/easy out store with comfortable places to sit - and that really is the priority in shopping these days.

He called me at work on Friday....and I always worry when I see the caller ID come up because he so rarely calls....we tend to email each other.  But when I picked up the phone - he was quite excited to report to me that there was a big sale on mens shoes at Kohls this weekend - that there was something called power hours Friday night and Saturday morning - and he felt like he was up to a shopping expedition.

Bless his heart.......we agreed that whenever he was up and about on Saturday I'd pick him up to go shopping.  He suggested eight oclock and I thought there was no way he'd ever be ready to go that early - but of course I told him that was fine - just call when he was set and I'd be over.

And he called at 8:01, ready for the expedition.  He was having one of his less than optimum mobility days, so we took his walker along. But since I was able to drop him off right at the front of the store - we didn't need a geezer crossing sign.

Now, this has nothing to do with the story, but I was googling "old people songs" and came across this......so let me share

(if you are easily amused and not easily offended you might want to check out the whole I Kill People video )

 The mission was successful as we found two pairs of shoes and then he mentioned that he liked polo shirts with pockets - so we picked up a couple of those as well. 

 He was feeling so good about being out and about that we decided to head over to the Amish market where we picked up some of the most wonderful potato salad on the planet - and some salami (he had a craving for the stuff - guess its an old person thing).

Of course we didn't just shop - we also talked.  One of the things I'm grateful for with my father is that we're able to discuss mortality.  None of us live forever, and although he always tells me that he doesn't plan on dying any time soon, it is important to him that I know what he has and where it is.  So he tells me that one of his goals is to accumulate enough cash that he can leave each of us a six figure inheritance, and that he was almost there.

I told him as much as I appreciated the thought - I would prefer having him around for as long as possible.....so maybe he could keep going till he saved enough to give us seven figures each ;).

Old people are strange...but I do love my dad.

6/16 Ain't got no trouble in my life

No foolish dreams to make me cry
I'm never frightened or worried
I know I'll always get by....

That Kiki Dee song from my youth got stuck in my head as I sat down to write this blog.....and if you don't know it, I'll put the YouTube video here to help out

I have a great deal of sympathy for those folks suffering from clinical depression.  I'm having a difficult enough time with mood swings - their unpredictability keeps me off balance and I cannot fathom having to live this way for years on end.  Perhaps there was a reason that the female life expectancy 100 years ago was 51.9 years.

OK - that's just too creepy as I am currently  51.65 years old.

See what these damned hormones do?  Of course I am grateful to be alive in this day and age.....please overlook my brief moment of grumpiness.

Quite seriously though - what a difference a day makes.....and I need to do a better job of hanging on to those f#ng awesome moments so that they can carry me through the not so great ones.

What's the saying?  Into each life some rain must fall....and ironically we just had a storm roll through.  I hope it comes back as its been very dry here and we really need more than just a quick downpour to bring everything back to life.

Speaking of back to life - I have gladioli blooming out front.

And because you all know that I like to plant things you are probably thinking - OK they're pretty but what's the big deal?

The big deal is that you are supposed to pull the bulbs each fall because they can't stand our winters.....and I didn't bother to do that last year.....so I am amazed to see them not only back, but more and better than before.

Now, I don't think that's a sign that I should start practicing benign neglect: my furkids wouldn't stand for being ignored,  things around the house are not going to magically fix themselves, and although I've complained that my professor's don't seem to actually review my work at times - I doubt that I'd get good grades if I did nothing.

I take it as a matter of luck, perhaps with a bit of karma sprinkled in. 

In other news, I got my new camera and my new TV in the past couple of days.  I am thrilled to have proper zoom and wideangle capabilities with the new Lumix.......and it's still got an automatic setting where the camera figures out what I'm looking at and sets itself accordingly.  Not perfect, but chances are it's more accurate than I am, lol.

And what can I say about the TV except it feels quite decadent to be watching almost lifesize actors while lying in bed.

I also bought Batcat a harness and leash set.  I have a figure eight sort of leash thing but it was quite a problem to get him hooked in and he was always getting tangled.  This is much more of a dog-like harness and leash - and he likes it.  So much so that we've taken walks around the yard the past couple of nights and he hasn't tried to break free at all.  Instead he seems to appreciate that I go where he wants to go and as he takes gentle direction well, I think by the end of the summer we might be taking hikes up to the park together :)

Last night I was sitting in the hot tub looking up at the moon (we didn't get to see the lunar eclipse here, but it was still quite a lovely night).   It was one of those times when all felt right with the world and I was very certain that I was where I wanted to be.

And although these damned moodswings might cast a shadow over me - the reality beneath remains unchanged.....things are damn good at Chez Em.

I hear that the rain just started up again......another lucky moment for me.

I hope that whatever else might be happening in your lives, you have at least a few lucky moments sprinkled in.

June 13th - She shops, she scores.......and maybe learns a bit too

First off – let me introduce you to the headliner – my Tyler Rodan Barnum Tote.  This bag is big enough to carry my Nook and my Netbook, has enough compartments that I won’t need to go digging for my wallet or my camera, and best of all, it’s got an extra crossbody strap which is a much safer way to carry a bag while traveling. 

I think its even big enough I could stash lunch and a bottle of wine in there should I get the urge to picnic on the Spanish Steps.  Oh wait, scratch that – you are not permitted to eat on the Spanish Steps.

It was 31.00 at Ross, which was more than I wanted to spend….but when I got home and googled – turns out its almost twice the price at Amazon.com….so I definitely got myself a deal.

And then there’s the sedum.

I was at Lowes picking up some birdseed and they happened to have creeping variegated sedum marked down to 75 cents a pot…..so I bought a few to put in the front garden bed.  I’m partial to perennials because I don’t have to keep buying them year after year….and these will tuck nicely into a few bare spots.

On the way home I stopped by the grocery store to discover a package of store-made portabello/swiss burgers marked down to four dollars – so dinner was a no brainer……though it was still so hot that I ended up pulling out the George Foreman rather than deal with the grill.

 (not my burgers - just a googled photo)

A funny thing happened at the grocery store.  I looked over to the checkout line next to mine and saw my Dad.  So I switched lines to be behind him and said Hi.  He had a bit of a guilty look on his face, and I remembered that I’d offered to go shopping for him and he’d told me he didn’t need anything.  I also noticed he was wearing this horridly old discolored nylon jacket that I’d thought he had tossed years before.

I opened my mouth to start criticizing…..but for once I was smart enough to shut it again without saying anything other than “let me get these things out of the cart for you”.  We chatted while waiting in line – I offered to pay for his groceries, and of course he said no…….I asked him if he wanted help getting his stuff to the car and again he said no, that he was just fine.

And he was fine….slow of course, one of those old people that I get frustrated by when I’m in a hurry……but he was just fine.  I caught up with him after I paid for my own purchases, gave him a hug and told him I’d see him soon.

As I was leaving, one of the employees called me over and asked me if I was related to Mr John.  I told him who I was, and mentioned that I was surprised to see him out at the store on a Sunday, let alone in the afternoon when it tends to be crowded.  The man gave me an odd look, and then told me that you could set your watch by my father – he always arrived at 1:30 every Sunday afternoon.

Now, my dad always nods his head in agreement when I talk about how impossible traffic is on weekend afternoons, and how crowded all the stores are, and how he should go out during the week to do his errands because it’s easier.

But now I know– he’s nodding to be polite – he does whatever the heck he wants ;)

I’m glad that I haven’t managed to browbeat him into being less than he can – and I’m going to do my best to accept him as he is –ugly jacket and all.

6/10 - I Am Woman Hear Me

shriek like a little girl.....

Not me, mind you - nor my friend Stephanie.......we are women who have learned to take care of ourselves and those around us as demonstrated in today's after winetasting adventure.

Winetasting by the way was fine.....not quite sure that there was any rhyme or reason to the selections - but they included a blend from Washington State called Lady in Red that I'd already picked up a couple of weeks ago (very good wine that I need to blog one of these days).....and a nice inexpensive Nostrada Tempranillo that I'll quickly describe now.

From the website: "A deliciously contemporary, fruit-driven Tempranillo wine conceived for the tastes of today's modern wine consumer. Soft and smooth with powerful aromas of ripe forest fruits, blackcurrants and berries that beautifully complement the velvety sensations left on the palate. The full and pleasant aftertaste means there's definitely no stopping at one glass!"

As if I ever stop at one glass....but it is quite good - and even more so at 6.99 (I had a dollar off coupon). 

None of this has anything to do with our insect adventure - unless you think that it was the pre-Panera drinking that made us so daring.....but I assure you that I can handle much, much more than six tablespoons of wine and I'm quite sure Stephanie can as well....(especially since she's a Renn gal - and you know how those folks drink, lol).

Anyhow - here we are at Panera, I'm having a late lunch while Steph is nibbling on a small snack and drinking do it herself iced coffee.....(note - perhaps I should suggest the coffee bar at Target next time).....and some creature or another comes flying across the room.

And it is really a creature - some sort of winged insect which eventually positions itself on the ceiling probably 20 feet away from us.  No harm, no foul.

That's when we discover that several of the computer toting patrons are bug-phobic and finding it impossible to concentrate on whatever they were doing in fear that this insect will do something.  What that something is, I have no idea.....but the prospect was certainly terrifying to a certain young woman next to us.

Whether insects are inherently evil and thrive on our fright or if they are simply mindless creatures likely to make stupid decisions I don't know; but said bug decided to transfer itself to scared woman's wall....which was enough to set her trembling.

In hindsight, my machoness probably led everyone in the place to assume Stephanie and I were a couple (she looked particularly feminine in pink)....so let me apologize to her now for my instinctive reaction....

Which was to warn the frightened woman, and then stand on a chair in an attempt to whisk said insect off to a place where it might be better appreciated.

Unfortunately it was too high for me to reach...but it showed appreciation for my efforts by coming off the wall and landing on my arm.

That might have been the end of the story as a young man seemed willing to remove the bug from my arm (it was on my tricep and I couldn't see it)....but instead he swatted at it.

And that simply caused it to take off and land in or around the already terrified woman's computer bag.  Thinking back, I'm starting to believe that perhaps insects do have working brains and intentionally seek out those who hate them.....I believe Stephanie mentioned that - comparing them to cats, in fact.

After a probably longer than necessary period of time discussing where the bug went and what should be done, I picked up the computer bag to discover the bug was beneath it.......and upon being disturbed, the insect fled to the floor.

Bad decision on the bug's part, because Stephanie quickly agreed to stomp on it (I was wearing sandals while she had closed toe sneakers)......and thus the crisis ended.

All's well that ends well - but I must say that I am a bit concerned about the future of America if it's young women can't even stand up to a one inch bug.

 

June 9th - Didja miss me?

I actually blogged yesterday but went to doublecheck a link and once again managed to delete the entire thing.
So I have vowed to write everything in word and then cut and paste.  It won't feel so spontaneous, but at least I'll manage to get something posted a bit more often.

Although different day, same sh#t at Chez Em.

Its HOT HOT HOT  - in fact, I just heard CBS news announce that Baltimore broke their temperature record today as the thermometer hit 100.  Not a big deal really, because they broke yesterday's record when they hit 99.

Almost 7 pm and this is what I'm looking at.....

I wondered if perhaps the largest solar flare ever recorded had something to do with the weather, but the experts say no.

However, they did mention that there could be some signal interference here on Earth - and oddly enough, all of the traffic signals in town were out when I left work.  And I don't mean blinking - I mean nada, nothing, blank.....it was like the opening pages of a Stephen King novel.

(not mine but not too far off of the clusterf#ck that was Rte 1)

And apparently only 10% of the local population knows the proper procedure when approaching a non-functional traffic signal.....which meant that the other 90% were either honking at or trying to hit the courteous drivers.

It really is miserably hot for so early in the season - I find it amazing that I ever managed to live without airconditioning, and yet we didn't even have window units when I was a little girl - and I didn't have air conditioning in my car until my 1986 Dodge Daytona  (not mine - just a lookalike)

 (damn I loved that car).
So what do you think - is it hotter now than it used to be or have I just become a wimp?


Oh, and as for the lead picture - that's the Shopaholic Angel...available here.
I am afraid that I've been a bit of a shopaholic....I would blame it on the heat, because where else to go when its miserably hot but a nice, cool mall?
But I can't use that excuse because it's been all online shopping :). 

To my credit, I really did need a new camera - I still love my Canon A590, but the optical viewfinder has clouded up and I really wanted more than a 4X zoom. So I picked up the Panasonic DMC-ZS6 from Woot for 144.99.  Of course, they ship by mule so I'm sure it will be another week before I see the thing....but still, I'm looking forward to a new toy.

and then I bought a 37 inch LCD TV from Sears.com.

I put that in a very small font hoping that no one who knows me well sees it because that means I will now have 4 flatscreen TVs in the house - and I live alone.

Let's hope that my U2 tickets sell on Ebay to cover some of this spendstravaganza.

Tonights earworm brought to you

by Foster the People....

"All the other kids with the pumped up kicks
You'd better run, better run, outrun my gun"
<insert evil grin here>

6/2 - Hello?

Drunk dialing is a pop-culture term denoting an instance in which an intoxicated individual places phone calls that he or she would not likely place if sober. The term often refers to a lonely individual calling former or current love interests.

You wanna guess who drunk-dialed me last night?  At least it was only 10 pm - not 2 am......but as I discovered when I looked back at my old Multiply blogs - even two years and five months later the song remains the same.

What didn't remain the same was my reaction to it.  I rather enjoyed the apologies......acknowledged that he did screw up the best thing that had ever happened to him.....but then pointed out that it was for the best as we would never have lasted seeing as we have such different interests.  I assured him that I wasn't bitter - congratulated him on his new car (He bought a Honda Civic if I remember right) and a new job somewhere near Baltimore's Inner Harbor.

And I have to confess that Evil Em quite enjoyed the feeling of superiority that she got from the conversation......he's a sad and lonely man while I've got a pretty damn good life going.

Will he call again?  I don't know and I don't care -  but for last night, it was kind of nice to think of myself as the prize that got away :)

6/1/11 - Hot Hot Hot

so my little buddy and I are sharing a mojito this evening.  This guy was the bribe I needed to join Friends of the National Zoo.  Hmmm, Brew at the Zoo sounds like fun.

Sorry about that - I got distracted by the thought of alcohol :).  Anyhow - the contribution was tax deductible and for a good cause....I love the idea that so many wonderful places in Washington are free......and don't mind helping to keep them that way.

Which made me worry about those adorable Giant Pandas in this heat.....5:30 pm and it's

93°F (33°C)

Broken Clouds

while they generally live in temperate rainforests - much more like the Pacific Northwest than the steamy south. However, they have very plush digs here which include not only water-cooled rocks, but air conditioned inside rooms.......a particularly good idea because "Mei Xiang has been busy constructing her nest of bamboo and mulberry branches, adding bamboo shreds almost every night."  No guarantee that it's a real pregnancy this time, but if it is, I imagine she's quite hormonal and in the zookeepers best interest to keep her happy.

 It seems like this is a crittercentric blog today...I was adding water to my fountain tonight and noticed some small critters in there that remind me of baby guppies.  But since fish certainly wouldn't walk across my yard to breed, I'm guessing they are tadpoles.  Don't know if they'll make it to frog or toodhood, but I'll make sure to keep the basin full and only use dechlorinated water to give them a chance.

OK - I was going to write some other stuff but my glass is empty and dinner is in the works......They've said we should get storms through tonight to cool things off a bit.....hope they're right.