in the conservatory? Or perhaps Professor Plum was involved......In any case....
Yes, I has a mystery........let me tell you what's happened. You may or may not remember that I finally broke my blogging silence to talk about a relationship issue. As you can probably tell - putting it out there did the trick - I've been able to move forward and focus on lots of other things in my life.
This morning I had a FB private message from my son telling me that someone had directed him to my blog. He pointed out that I was always welcome to visit, and said that if I had a problem with our relationship I was going about the opposite of resolving it. And although I realize its difficult to make an accurate assessment of the written word without the intonation and body language associated with hearing the voice and/or seeing the person, I believe its a safe assumption to say he was angry. He closed with saying he's going to forget the blog post happened.
Personally, I think that last part is a mistake - there was nothing I wrote that I haven't said to him out loud in the past....I just don't think he really heard me then and its very certain he didn't read me now either. But my own acceptance often equates with just "not thinking about it" - so who am I to criticize anyone else doing the same thing?
Anyhow - at first I was angry back - then I thought about it a bit and realized that he pretty much restated what I'd said on my blog - its just that he sees it as being my problem and not his, which is what I'd heard from him when I discussed this in person long ago.
And then I thought a little bit more and became a bit creeped out as to who was reading my blog that felt it a good idea to point this particular post out to my son. None of the readers I know of are family....and my friends aren't friends with my son. Although there is a link to my blog on my Facebook home page - its been months since I've crossposted any blogs on Google + or FB, so its not like I"m "out there".....heck, that particular post has only had 8 views total.
Then I calmed down. It might not always seem that way, but I'm careful what I write. I keep the blog public because I can never have too many friends....and if someone stumbles across what I've written and it strikes a chord with them and they want to start communicating with me - that's great. If that doesn't happen, that's fine as well - I write for myself to remember and hopefully learn and grow from the past.
So I'm not upset that someone I may not know found and read my blog - that's why its out there.
And when I think about it - having someone concerned enough about my sadness to want to try to help me is not something to be frightened off - its something to be grateful for. I've no doubt that whoever directed my son to my writings did so out of caring.
So, if you are the person who decided to help try to "fix" things for me - I appreciate the thought, but please don't try it anymore. But feel free to keep reading if you like.......
Yes, I has a mystery........let me tell you what's happened. You may or may not remember that I finally broke my blogging silence to talk about a relationship issue. As you can probably tell - putting it out there did the trick - I've been able to move forward and focus on lots of other things in my life.
This morning I had a FB private message from my son telling me that someone had directed him to my blog. He pointed out that I was always welcome to visit, and said that if I had a problem with our relationship I was going about the opposite of resolving it. And although I realize its difficult to make an accurate assessment of the written word without the intonation and body language associated with hearing the voice and/or seeing the person, I believe its a safe assumption to say he was angry. He closed with saying he's going to forget the blog post happened.
Personally, I think that last part is a mistake - there was nothing I wrote that I haven't said to him out loud in the past....I just don't think he really heard me then and its very certain he didn't read me now either. But my own acceptance often equates with just "not thinking about it" - so who am I to criticize anyone else doing the same thing?
Anyhow - at first I was angry back - then I thought about it a bit and realized that he pretty much restated what I'd said on my blog - its just that he sees it as being my problem and not his, which is what I'd heard from him when I discussed this in person long ago.
And then I thought a little bit more and became a bit creeped out as to who was reading my blog that felt it a good idea to point this particular post out to my son. None of the readers I know of are family....and my friends aren't friends with my son. Although there is a link to my blog on my Facebook home page - its been months since I've crossposted any blogs on Google + or FB, so its not like I"m "out there".....heck, that particular post has only had 8 views total.
Then I calmed down. It might not always seem that way, but I'm careful what I write. I keep the blog public because I can never have too many friends....and if someone stumbles across what I've written and it strikes a chord with them and they want to start communicating with me - that's great. If that doesn't happen, that's fine as well - I write for myself to remember and hopefully learn and grow from the past.
So I'm not upset that someone I may not know found and read my blog - that's why its out there.
And when I think about it - having someone concerned enough about my sadness to want to try to help me is not something to be frightened off - its something to be grateful for. I've no doubt that whoever directed my son to my writings did so out of caring.
So, if you are the person who decided to help try to "fix" things for me - I appreciate the thought, but please don't try it anymore. But feel free to keep reading if you like.......
Ug. I think I lost my comment again.
ReplyDeleteWell, there is one, I think.
ReplyDeleteAnyway - this time I was trying to say - it wasn't me who passed the info, though I did read your previous post. I was silently supporting you and hoping the portacrib would get some use because I think Grandmothers are great to have around! But, I wasn't even going to offer any advice because I was thinking that I didn't know your son at all so I had no idea how he would react to more communication, or less communication, or anything in between. Not that you were looking for advice, but I didn't want you to do anything that would cause more sadness. I had a similar philosophy when I was blogging - to try and not write anything that I hadn't already said in person, or wouldn't mind someone reading. Not that many people read the blog (which I should stop neglecting)! I will continue my (mostly) silent support. But it would be interesting if this mystery could be solved.
I hate that your comments get eaten because they are always so good....as is your neglected blog (not to get offtopic but I happened to re-find it yesterday as I was looking for Maui information). As for the thing with my son - I expect he wasn't upset about what I wrote so much as that someone pointed it out to him. And my guess is that it involves one of my facebook connections - a few of my ex-husbands family are on my friends list - and if they clicked around a bit my blog isn't hard to find. I appreciate your support, Fran and it makes my heart smile when I see the pictures of your little guy and all the family love that surrounds him.
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